DESIRE: A strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen.
"he resisted public desires for choice in education"synonyms: wish, want; fancy, inclination, aspiration, impulse, preference; yearning, longing, craving, hankering, pining, ache, hunger, thirst, itch, burning, need; eagerness, enthusiasm, determination; predilection, proclivity, predisposition; informalyen "I had a desire to see the world"
Fear is a feeling induced by perceived danger or threat that occurs in certain types of organisms, which causes a change in metabolic and organ functions and ultimately a change in behavior, such as fleeing, hiding, or freezing from perceived traumatic events. Fear in human beings may occur in response to a specific stimulus occurring in the present, or in anticipation or expectation of a future threat
perceived as a risk to body or life.
1. Awareness. Before you can begin overcoming fear, you have to be aware that your fears are causing havoc in your life. It’s easy to get so attached to your thoughts and feelings that you think they are all that exist, which couldn’t be further from the truth. You are not your fears. You are the awareness that experiences it.
2. Identify. Get specific about what exactly you’re afraid of. Look at the pictures you have in your head about the situation. What is happening in them? What are you really scared of? Become an observer of your inner space.
3. Curiosity. While curiosity may have killed the cat, it certainly won’t do you any harm when investigating your fears. Get curious about what thoughts generate your fear, where do you feel the fear, and how do you react to it? Again, be an observer of what is going on.
4. The Now. What are you lacking right now? When you center yourself in the now, you realize that everything is how it is. You naturally accept what is. Tapping into the now can be as simple as feeling your body and breath. My favorite book on the subject is Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.
5. EFT. EFT is short for Emotional Freedom Techniques. You use your fingertips to tap meridian points on your body while thinking of a fear you have and it alleviates and sometimes gets rid of the fear altogether. Simple, yet extremely powerful.
6. Sedona Method. Another simple system to conquer fear is the Sedona method. It consists of asking a few simple questions while focusing on your fear. It’s so simple that I dismissed it several times before taking it seriously. Bad move!
7. The Work. The Work is very similar to the Sedona method in that it asks questions. The Work is one of my favorite ways of dealing with fears, anxieties, and worries. There are many methods available, so pick the one that you resonate with.
8. Hypnosis. With hypnosis, you can program the right thoughts into your mind and eliminate negative thoughts and beliefs. This doesn’t work for everyone, but it might for you. My brother uses it to consistently evoke positive change in his life. But remember, this isn’t necessarily about getting rid of your fears, but learning to relate to them in a different way.
9. Gratitude. Whenever you feel fear, switch it over to what you are grateful for instead. If you’re afraid of public speaking, be grateful for the opportunity to communicate with so many people, and that they are there to genuinely listen to what you have to say.
10. Journaling. Getting your fears down on paper is important, because trying to think them through doesn’t work. You get caught in endless loops of negativity that only lead you further down the rabbit hole, and make your life miserable.
11. Talk. No-brainer advice, but how often do we hold the negative in because we are afraid of how others might react, or because of some other reason? Talking helps, but don’t throw a pity party for yourself.
12. Therapy. If you can find a good therapist, therapy can be highly beneficial, even life-changing. Finding the right therapist for you can be hard. Listen to your heart and choose someone who resonates with you.
13. NLP. NLP is short for Neuro-Linguistic Programming. I’ve been to a seminar with the co-founder, Richard Bandler. You learn how your mind works. NLP has helped thousands in eliminating phobias, fears, and other emotional problems, so it has its place, but only if it feels magnetic to you.
14. Life Coach. Do you have a fear of success, or a fear of failure? A good life coach can help you examine what you truly want from life, and where your fears come from. I’ve spoken to a few in my life and while it can be scary, it’s very helpful in getting clear about what you want and what’s stopping you.
15. Read. Reading a good book on your specific fear can open new doors on how you can get rid of it. I also like to read a lot of motivational and inspirational work on and around the topic I’m dealing with.
16. Take Action. I’m an action taker, and I know that fears are just fears. They are created by my imagination to make reality seem scarier than it is. When you take action and face your fears, they become weaker, because you realize that reality isn’t nearly as bad as your imagination.
17. Watch. Watching a movie or a documentary can be as enlightening as reading a book. Sometimes it’s nice to distract yourself from your fear, but if you really want to, you can find dozens of movies on the fear you’re dealing with.
18. Diet. Did you know that the food you eat can have a dramatic impact on how you feel? All the sugars, additives, sweeteners, and other chemicals in our foods have a surprisingly powerful effect in getting our body out of balance. Stick to a clean diet that suits you. Meaning, more fruits and vegetables. Just eat a bit more each day. See what happens.
19. Positivity. Whenever fear strikes, flip it over. Instead of thinking of something bad that can happen, think of something positive. What’s a positive outcome to your fear? If you’re thinking about public speaking, imagine yourself being wildly successful instead of failing horribly. This is very similar to #9, but with a small twist.
20. Perspective. Learning to deal with fear is all about putting your negative thoughts in perspective. We tend to focus too much on the negative, so by looking at all the options, you often realize that you’re making a big deal of nothing. There are so many things that can happen that it’s impossible for you to predict. We aren’t psychics.
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